It was beautiful, it was romantic, it was ever so slightly pervy.
Writing a blog has caused me to analyse my own , frankly disturbing dreams and fantasies. This is generally because the hero (myself being the heroine) is usually a much older man. Yesterday I saw the music video for Within Temptation’s ‘Angels’ (watch it yourself…you’ll see why it is related.) and I said to myself: That’s it, no more older men fantasies. This has to stop.
And yet my imagination still runs away with itself.
I was a young,beautiful, penniless woman walking down a dusty road through the desert , the cruel sun was beating down upon me. I was fleeing from an (old-Aladdin-style) state of female oppression and forced marriage to gross gross men. It was very hot and I was very tired and running out of water. On the left side of the road a man on a camel came up behind me. He looked rich and had a train of servants on donkeys following him. Yes, he was kinda , slightly FAR TOO OLD FOR ME!!! anyway he offered me a lift , I was like “ugh, no.” (being in a state of anger with men in general and the whole setup of society)
The next thing I knew I was riding on his camel up in front of him with his arms around me and we were rocking back and forth with the motion. (STOP THINKING THAT!) I was pissed off with the situation. He seemed to think that this was extremely amusing and informed me that I had fainted. This left me feeling even more angry at the fact that I had been rescued by him and was now in his debt. I tried to get off but his grip was firm and he was like : ‘what? without any water?’. I felt like a fool. Anyway we carried on along the road and didn’t talk much, pretending to be angry. He still found this funny. (by the way, he looked a bit like a slightly Arabian version of Sean Connery, Aladdin style setting and all that) My temper had cooled down to silent gratefulness and slight friendship by the time I camped with him at sunset (OF COURSE WE DIDN’T). To cut a long story , the details of which I cannot recall, short , after days of riding on his camel through the desert (NOT LIKE THAT!) and lots of very nice, if slightly flirtatious conversation we fell madly in love. Aww. At last we came to our destination which was the oasis where his brother and his family lived and were starting a new town. We got married, had lots of sex and babies (I quote ‘love actually’ ) and lived happily ever after . The End.
That’s not so bad – Is it?
Apart from the whole – by running away from male dominance etc you’re fantasizing about it slightly, yes I see the hypocrisy, but to be honest, I’m fine with it. As long as he’s a nice guy, and very good looking.
I’m getting way, way too into this.
Pervy old men, dear, pervy old men.
PS. I was thinking later, maybe it’s not so bad , let’s just say he’s not that much older than me. Mr Knightley was seventeen years older than Emma after all, and if Jane Austen approves, who am I to say she’s wrong?
